Nietzsche in the Morning, then Just Walk Away

Ask El Gorto
Young Freddy Nietzche at Mickey’s Blue Haven Bar in Hell’s Kitchen

Dear El Gorto,

I am a graduating philosophy student at Cornell College in Iowa and am a huge fan of yours. Your book, Finding Balance, really helped me with both my yoga poses and when things were not going so well with my boyfriend.

I am finishing my Honors Thesis on Nietzsche’s The Gay Science. My question to you, El Gorto, is simply, how do you apply Nietzsche’s philosophy in your day-to-day life? 


Molly Ringwalder
Mount Vernon, Iowa

Dear Molly,

It’s hard to be sure of anything, but I do know Mount Vernon is in Virginia, and Cornell is in Ithaca, New York. So don’t try to fool me.

As far as applying Nietzsche to my everyday life, simple: That which doesn’t kill El Gorto, makes El Gorto stronger. 

Slightly miffed,
El Gorto

On Worldly Engagement


A Social Engagement Specialist gave me the ball and told me to run with it. I don’t understand that business jargon, but I did run. Well, I sort of jogged. Did I mention sciatica? Back at the couch, I sat. Then I pondered, and nearly made an inquiry: Are any disengagement specialists opportunities available, how much do they make, what are the hours and do they wear helmets? – El Gorto

Safety first, fashion later.

EL Gorto Kicks off Oprah’s Gonzo Series Book Club


“Jon [Voight] was never the same after that famed chicken fight up in Laurel Canyon. Burt [Reynolds] nearly strangled him with his thighs of steel, but Jon— always the tough guy—never said anything. Burt just kept on squeezing.  Once Jon did talk, we simply ignored him, a real tragedy.”  — El Gorto, The Great American Chicken Fight

A tale that had to be told. – Oprah Winfrey

Yodeling in My Head

Ask El Gorto
Dear El Gorto,
I can’t get this yodeling out of my head. 
I listened to Hocus Pocus by the group Focus. Swear to God, that is the name of the group and song.
Here is the link, but I warn you it is like watching that video in the movie The Ring or sleeping with that dude in It Follows.
(About a minute in, it all begins, and never ends).
What’s a guy to do?
Desperately yours,
Von Trapped
Dear Von Trapped,
Your reference to The Ring is lost on me. I don’t like all that Wagnerian fantasy world crap with little people. And It Follows?
The last decent film I saw was Delta Force featuring Lee Marvin. Now that was a movie and that was an actor. I doubt he’d have any issue with yodeling.
In fact, when I don’t hear yodeling, I get nervous.
You might just have a bizarre case of tinnitus. I had a dog that couldn’t get the Theme song from WKRP in Cincinnati out of his head. We had to put him down.
I recommend you fill your head with some other sort of sound. If it doesn’t drive you postal, try the theme from Claude Lelouch’s “Un Homme et Une Femme” movie. Give it a try and the yodeling will go away.

Theme Song from a Man and a Woman
El Gorto