Dear El Gorto,

Dean Martin is not a long-haired hippie who takes LSD, speed, etc. When he is in a movie it is not sexy like most other movies. He does not need a band to make music because he himself fills the air with a romantic song. There are still some who prefer relaxing music to rock ‘n’ roll.

— Jim Johnson, Wood River, Ill.

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Dear Jim,

You got a question or do you just need to rant?  I bet you drive your whole family nuts. Keep it up. There’s a whole cottage industry for guys like you, (bumper stickers and truck stop novelty items). 

Listen, pal. I admire your grit and your unabashed man love for the great Dean Martin, but you’ll never catch me watching a Matt Helm movie. 

— El Gorto

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